I had been a church member for years, had participated in many evangelism courses, had even done some one to one witnessing and was involved in a local street ministry, however something was missing.
It wasn’t until I was going through an evangelistic training which used the law (the Ten Commandments) to bring the knowledge of sin (Gal 3:24) that I examined myself (2 Cor 13:5) by the light of God’s standard. As I did this I realized that I had broken all ten of the commandments; if not in actual deed, in my heart. When I saw myself as God saw me I knew that I was guilty and on Judgment day (Acts 17:31) I would be headed for Hell. No amount of good deeds, reformed living, or new spirituality could save my soul. God demands justice for sin, but in His mercy He had already made a way for my forgiveness.
Jesus Christ, who was God, became a man, was born of a virgin and lived a perfect sinless life. He was made sin for us, who (Jesus) knew no sin, that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him (2 Cor 5:21). He was God’s only perfect sacrifice for sin. On the Cross he bore the wrath of God and shed his blood for the forgiveness of my sin. By His resurrection he defeated death and Hell and proved He was God.
I had always believed this but found out that it’s not enough to believe. The Bible states that unless you repent you will all perish (Luke 13:3) I had never truly repented because I had never seen my need to repent until I saw myself in the light of God‘s perfect standard.
I repented, confessed and forsook my sin and placed my trust in the resurrected Christ who died to save me from my sins. I now have a new heart with a new desire to serve the Living God, to do his will. It is God’s will that none should perish but all should come to repentance. (2 Peter 3:9)
I "asked Jesus into my heart" when I was six years old. Once my teen-age years rolled around I lived like the rest of the world and continued on with a worldly lifestyle into my marriage and two children. Somehow God started letting me know something was wrong when my first child was born, but I was so far from God I didn't know it was God. Over the next few years I was searching (not necessarily for God) and I found out what my life was missing.... Jesus Christ. I had said "the prayer" as a child but there was no inward change. I was not Born Again. I was absolutely lost and on my way to hell. God showed me that I must come to him in brokenness through repentance and trust in His sacrifice through Jesus. This was a hard idea for me to "come to grips" with because I kept telling myself that I was saved. In my mind I would remember back to repeating a prayer after a pastor and being baptized at the age of six, and I would put off these thoughts that God would bring into my mind about my salvation. My problem was that I had to get lost before I could get saved. I suppose this is a hazard of growing up in a "Christian nation" and more specifically the Bible Belt. Almost everyone in America thinks they are a Christian because they were baptized as a child, went to church as a child, or repeated some "magical words" after a pastor at some point in their life. This is a damnable belief and false teaching on our churches' behalf. No one can be saved unless they have been born again (John 3) by surrendering to the resurrected Lord Jesus Christ.
It was during this season of my life that the Spirit of God was convicting me of all my sins that I had done throughout my life. He would bring to my remembrance gross and willful sins from my past that I had all but forgotten. I would burst into tears because it was the first time in my life I realized that those sins were against God Himself and it was those very sins, my sins, that hung Jesus on the cross. I would cry out to God and ask Him to forgive me as these specific sins were brought to my mind. This went on for a few months... on and off it seemed. I would go a day (thinking on God) but not being convicted of any specific sins, but then another day would come and it seemed as if God's conviction was reigning down on me so hard I could not breathe. It was during this time that I truly realized my need for a Saviour.... Jesus Christ!
I was 33 years-old when God saved me and I praise Him every day for that! I continue to praise him for crushing me under the weight of my sins and showing me the need for Jesus. It was at that time that I finally realized I didn't need to "ask Jesus into my heart" and I didn't need Him for a better life. I NEEDED HIM TO ESCAPE THE WRATH TO COME!
Today I know that I am saved because of Jesus alone and His finished work on the cross. I have repented of my sins and put my faith in Jesus Christ alone. I know that I am a child of God because I have surrendered my life to Jesus Christ. I now no longer live my life to my will, but rather I live my life according to Jesus Christ's will.
When I did get saved I wanted to get baptized. I had been baptized as a child, but I was not truly saved then, so I just considered that an obligatory dunk. Below you can watch the video of my REAL baptism.
For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek.
